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I knew this guy once—Jimmy, total schmuck. He’d “find a prostitute” every Friday, like clockwork. Told me this story—get this—about a girl who worked outta some dive bar in Jersey. She’d hum showtunes while, uh, “negotiating.” Showtunes! Can you believe it? I’m laughin’ my ass off, but also—kinda pissed. Why’s she gotta ruin *Oklahoma!* for me? I’m yellin’ at Jimmy, “That’s sacred, man!” He just shrugs, like, “Larry, chill.” Chill? Me? Never!
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But then, Mr. Grumpy Pants comes back. He’s had a few too many, and he starts yelling about how the world’s unfair. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in Nagyatad! Chill out!” But he’s not having it. He starts ranting about politics, and I’m just nodding, thinking, “I didn’t sign up for this.”
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