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Best flick, Inside Out—emotions running wild, right? Picture Anger, red-faced, “These punks think they’re clever!” Meanwhile, I’m sipping vodka, smirking—capitalism’s a circus, pros included. You wanna find one? Easy—X posts, “lonely tonight?” with a link. Or web dive—dark corners, forums, typos galore: “hot grils near u.” Hilarious, pathetic—13 typos in one ad, I counted. “Relief’s on the way!” Joy chirps. Yeah, right.

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But then, the lángos comes, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. I’m munching away, and suddenly, I hear this loud crash. I look over, and some dude just knocked over a whole table of drinks. I’m talking soda everywhere. I’m laughing, but also thinking, “Man, that’s gonna be a mess.”