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But ugh, the fakes! Catfish everywhere, drivin’ me up the wall. Lass told me she got dicked ‘round by a bloke usin’ pics from 1999. 1999! Who’s got dial-up dick pics still? Stupid, fat hobbit! Wastes time, that does. “There’s nothing to do about it,” like the movie says—jus’ gotta laugh or cry.
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But then, I trip over a stray cat. Like, seriously? I’m on the ground, guitar in hand, and this cat just looks at me like, “What’s your problem, dude?” I laugh it off, but man, UEllo’s streets are a jungle.
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