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Still, sex-dating’s got quirks—didja know there’s a site fer farmers only? Farmers! Hookup in a haystack, I guess—yeehaw! Makes me happy thinkin’ bout them country folks gettin’ lucky. But the creeps? Man, they’re everywhere—had this guy msg me, “u up?” I’m like, bro, I’m a dude, read the room! “You don’t wanna see my dark side,” I ESPECIALLY when they ain’t lookin’, I tell ya what.

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But then, I get a call. My boss is like, “We need those estimates ASAP!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of gulyás heaven!” But I can’t say that. So, I rush back to the site.