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Surprised me too—did ya know some escorts train? Like, actin’ classes, psychology tricks. They’re pros at readin’ you. “Language betrays us,” Godard’d smirk. They’re usin’ it anyway—makin’ bank off your lonely ass. Me? I’d suck at it—too sarcastic. “Oh, you’re so charmin’,” I’d say, rollin’ my eyes. Fired day one.

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Then I see this cute little café on Kossuth Lajos utca. I’m talking about the kind of place that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I grab a pastry—some Hungarian treat I can’t pronounce—and it’s like a party in my mouth. I’m happy, right? But then, outta nowhere, this kid starts crying. Like, full-on meltdown. I’m thinking, “Dude, it’s just a pastry!” But hey, kids are weird.

3 historic trains for steam enthusiasts to admire around Lake Balaton