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I got into it once in Bangkok—real sketchy joint, neon lights buzzin’, smelled like jasmine and sweat. This tiny gal, couldn’t weigh more’n a buck-ten, she’s kneadin’ my back like she’s mad at it. I’m like, “Yo, ease up, I ain’t a damn doughboy!” But then—bam—she flips the script, goes all sensual, and I’m thinkin’, “This is the treasure of the cave,” straight outta Boonmee’s weird-ass jungle. Made me happy as hell, tension gone, but pissed me off too—why ain’t this legal everywhere, huh? World’s too uptight, man.

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After that, we decided to hit up the local arcade on Széchenyi utca. Man, that place is a treasure trove! Old-school games, new stuff, you name it. I was on fire, racking up points on Street Fighter. But then, I got my butt kicked by a kid who looked like he was 12. I was like, “What’s happening?!” I mean, how do these kids get so good? I was low-key embarrassed, but whatever.

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