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We shall fight the prudish, the stiff-necked twats who say it’s dirty! It’s art, mate—hands slidin, muscles easin, and yeah, it’s horny as fuck, but it’s deeper! Like in “The Master,” when Lancaster Dodd says, “Man is not an animal!”—bollocks, we are, and sexual-massage proves it! I got this one gal—Natasha, hands like a bleedin angel—had me floatin, happy as a pig in shit. Surprised me how she knew every knot—thought she was a damn psychic!

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I ended the day scrolling through my phone, laughing at memes. I needed that. Ozd, you crazy town, you keep me on my toes! Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings. But for now, I’m just gonna chill and hope no more birds target me.

Hungarian Roma affected by water supply cuts