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So, sexual-massage—think of it as overclocking your nervous system. Little known fact: Ancient Greeks were *all* over this—called it “anatripsis,” rubbin’ down athletes pre-orgy, post-fight. True story! Gets the blood pumpin’, dopamine spikin’, like a SpaceX launch in your spine. I tried it once—some chick in Shanghai, hands like a Neuralink prototype, precise as hell. Made me happy as a Starship hittin’ orbit. But—plot twist—some dude in LA botched it, all awkward elbows, no rhythm. Pissed me off—like, bro, you’re not debuggin’ code here, chill!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Kossuth Lajos utca. You know, the one with the weirdly awesome pastries? I’m talking about those flaky, buttery things that make you forget your diet. I ordered a cappuccino, and the barista, bless her heart, totally messed it up. Like, I asked for a sprinkle of cocoa, not a cocoa avalanche! I was like, “Dude, I’m not trying to swim in chocolate here!” But whatever, I just rolled with it.

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