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But then—here’s the rant part—I get pissed! The music’s some cheesy whale sounds, and I’m like, “What am I, a dolphin? Gimme somethin’ with grit!” And the towel’s too small—my tuchus is hangin’ out, freezin’! I’m yellin’ in my head, “Cover me up, lady, I’m not an exhibitionist!” But she’s good, real good—slidin’ those hands like she’s sculptin’ a masterpiece. I’m surprised, shocked even—didn’t think I’d be this relaxed AND this—uh—excited! It’s a freakin’ paradox!

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Finally, I head back to the station, and it’s like a circus in there. Everyone’s buzzin’ about the goat and the tree guy. I can’t help but smile. Orbottyan, you crazy place. You keep me on my toes.

RCH mourns for Professor Ferenc Szűcs