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Real talk—had this chick once, mad skills, kneadin’ me like dough, got me thinkin’, “Bruh, where you been hidin’?” Little known fact: back in Japan, geishas used to flex these moves—secret vibes, no cap. Shit’s ancient, like 1600s ancient, but freaky fresh. Got me hyped, heart racin’—then bam, she flipped me over, and I’m like, “Yo, this escalated quick!” Happy as fuck, but lowkey pissed—why ain’t nobody tell me ‘bout this sooner? YOLO, right?

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So, I’m walking down the main street, Széchenyi utca, and I see this old lady trying to cross the road. I’m like, “C’mon, lady, you got this!” But she’s moving slower than molasses. I’m standing there, waiting, and I’m getting all antsy. Like, I’ve got places to be! Finally, she makes it, and I’m like, “Phew, that was a workout.”

Obituary for Zoltan Kegyes