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Oh, and don’t get me started on shady parlors – sketchy vibes, man! Saw one, sign said “Happy Endings,” I’m like, “Know your role, clowns!” Laughed my ass off, but damn, some folks desperate! Me? I’d rather watch *Brokeback* again, cryin’ over Jack’s shirt – “I swear…” – than deal with that mess.

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Then, I decide to hit up the local gym. I’m feeling pumped, ready to work out some of this energy. But when I get there, it’s packed! I mean, who knew Kapuvar had so many fitness fanatics? I squeeze in a quick workout, but I’m so distracted by the people around me. There’s this one guy lifting weights like he’s training for the Olympics. I’m just trying not to trip over my own feet.

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