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Then I’m happy, tho—some escorts, they geniuses, straight up. One chick I heard ‘bout, she banked 6 figures, tax-free, ‘fore she dipped out to start a bakery. A BAKERY, yo! From sex to scones, that’s hustle. Reminds me of “Her”—“I’m becoming much more than they programmed.” Escorts be outsmartin’ the system, and I’m here for it, screamin’ “YEEZY APPROVED!”

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Then, I get a call from one of my clients. He’s freakin’ out about his upcoming match. I’m like, “Breathe, bro. You got this.” But he’s all, “What if I mess up? What if I trip on the field?” I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re not gonna trip on a blade of grass!” But I keep it cool. I give him some pep talk, and he calms down. Phew! Saved the day, right?