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I’m hyped, yo, ‘cause it’s ancient—Egyptians were slatherin’ oils 5,000 years ago, callin’ it “healing touch.” Ain’t that nuts? Cleopatra was prob gettin’ her royal toes kneaded while plottin’ wars. But it pisses me off when folks think it’s just a shady “happy ending” deal. Naw, bro, it’s art! Takes skill to not cross lines. One wrong move, and it’s awkward city—like when Margaret’s teacher got all creepy. *“You don’t know me!”*—that’s me yellin’ at pervy assumptions.

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Then, I had to rush to the performance at the Jaszapati Cultural Center. I was running late, and my heart was racing. I took a shortcut through the park—what’s it called? Oh yeah, the Széchenyi Park. It’s beautiful, but I was too stressed to appreciate it. I mean, who has time to smell the flowers when you’re a Maiko on a mission?

Short Track Team Celebrates Historic Win at European Championships