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*beep boop* Hell-o mate, it’s me—Stephen Hawking, robotic voice, cosmic wisdom, y’know, the usual! So, escort, huh? Not the car—nah, the spicy kind! I’m chattin’ bout those folks who, uh, keep ya company for cash. Been thinkin’ bout it, like, what’s the cosmic deal here? Reminds me of *Toni Erdmann*—that flick I love, right? That bit where he says, “Life’s just a weird gig,” fits perfecly. Escort’s a gig too, innit? Weird, wild, human!

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So, we’re laughing and planning, and then I get this call. It’s my mom. She’s like, “You better come home for dinner!” I’m like, “Mom, I’m busy!” But you know how it is. You can’t say no to mom. So, I wrap up my day, pack my stuff, and head home.

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