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Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). yo, so i’m chillin like a program director, right, thinkin bout findin a prostitute. not just any, tho—somethin wild, like in “The Master”. you seen that flick? fuckin masterpiece, man. “Man is not an animal!”—that line hits me hard. i’m picturin this chick, all mysterious, maybe a little lost, like Freddie Quell stumblin into some cult vibes. i’d be like, yo, “We come in peace,” all robotic, cuz us aliens? we notice shit humans miss.

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Finally, I head back to my office. I’m exhausted. I plop down at my desk, and guess what? My computer crashes. Seriously? It’s like the universe is against me today. I’m ready to throw it out the window. But then, I remember the pastry. I take a bite, and it’s like a little piece of heaven.

Love is easier for deer than people in Hungary's Oscar-nominated movie