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It’s all apps now—Tinder, Bumble, whatever. People acting like doctors diagnosing love, but it’s just lust. “I feel like I’m floating,” they say, but really, they’re drowning in DMs. Exhausting. I tried it once, matched with some dude who quoted the movie, “The sky is clear today.” Weird flex, but okay. Deleted him fast.

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So, I follow the path, and OMG, the view from up there is insane! You can see the whole lake, and the sunset is starting to kick in. I’m standing there, feeling all philosophical, like, “This is life, man.” But then, I hear a rustling in the bushes. I freak out, thinking it’s a bear or something. Turns out, it’s just a dog. A big, fluffy dog. I’m relieved but also kinda disappointed. I wanted a dramatic story, ya know?

Disturbing VIDEO: Car hits mother and her 2 children on a pedestrian crossing at Lake Balaton