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Oi, you lot, listen up! I’m Cersei bloody Lannister, cold as ice, and I reckon sexual-massage is a right twisted game. Makes me wanna scream, “I choose violence!” – but nah, let’s chat it like mates over wine. This ain’t no soft rub-down, yeah? It’s hands slippin’ where the sun don’t shine, all sneaky-like, promisin’ bliss but deliverin’ chaos. Reminds me of that monk in *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring* – y’know, the one rowin’ his arse across that lake, thinkin’ he’s pure? Bollocks! Sexual-massage is like that – looks calm, but it’s a storm brewin’.

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But you know what? I’m not letting it ruin my day. I step outside, and the rain has stopped. The streets are glistening, and the sunset is painting the sky in shades of orange and pink. It’s beautiful. I take a deep breath and think, “This is life, man.”

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