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Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m a detective, see, been diggin’ through life’s messes, and lemme tell ya ‘bout sexual-massage. It’s wild, slippery stuff—like tryna hold sand, ya know? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout them hands slidin’ over skin, oil drippin’, folks moanin’ soft-like. Reminds me of *Tropical Malady*, that flick I love—ya seen it? “The beast stalks in shadows,” all quiet and steamy, jungle heat risin’. Sexual-massage got that vibe—slow burn, then bam, tension snaps! How’s that workin’ for ya, huh?

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Then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need.” Everyone’s scrambling, and I’m trying to keep my cool. I’m like, “Guys, it’s probably just a drill.” But deep down, I’m sweating bullets. Turns out, it was just some idiot trying to cook in the common area. Seriously, who thought making a microwave meal was a good idea?

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