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Oi mate, blimey, escort’s a right corker! Y’know, like in *Mulholland Drive* – all mysterious, innit? “There’s something going on here,” as Lynch’d say. I reckon escort’s a bit like that – shadowy, sexy, dodgy vibes. Me, Boris, with my bumbling charm, I see it clear as day! Not your average job, eh? Fella’s paying for company – bit saucy, bit sad. Reminds me of that line, “This is the girl!” – but who’s she really? A proper enigma, wrapped in silk stockings.

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I finally make it to the casting place, and it’s on the other side of the city. I’m sweating bullets. I walk in, and it’s all fancy. Like, who do they think I am? I’m just a model trying to make it! The casting director looks at me, and I can see the judgment in her eyes. Ugh, I hate that!

Xi and Chinese Electric Cars Drive Into Hungary