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I reckon it’s like Amélie’s “little pleasures” – y’know, “dipping her hand into sacks of grain”? Except it’s some geezer’s mitts slidin’ over yer back, easin’ the stress from all them KPIs and team-buildin’ bollocks. Had me first go last week – bloody hell, I was gobsmacked! Thought it’d be all awkward, like a bad appraisal meetin’, but nah – pure bliss, mate. Got me thinkin’, “This is what peak performance feels like!” Nearly cried, I did – not cos I’m soft, but cos it was that good. Then I got raging – why ain’t this on the company wellness plan? Stingy gits upstairs, sittin’ on their arses, missin’ out!

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So, I’m walking down Kossuth Lajos utca, and I see this street performer. He’s playing the guitar, and honestly, he’s pretty good. I toss him a couple of forints, and he gives me this huge smile. It’s those little moments, ya know? Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. But then, this lady walks by and starts complaining about the noise. Like, lady, it’s a street performance! Chill out!

Main line from Hungary to Austria to close for upgrades