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Little secret, eh? Back in ‘70s—way before apps—folks did “key parties.” Toss yer car keys in a bowl, pick one, shag whoever’s it was! Wild, right? Carlos’d love that chaos—“Revolution is not a dinner party,” he’d say, all smug. Sex-dating now’s tamer, but still messy. Profiles lie, STDs lurk—ugh, makes me itch thinkin’ it! One mate got catfished by a bloke pretendin’ to be a chick—surprise of his life, hah! Laughed ‘til I choked on me own spit.

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Finally, we got started. The dance was supposed to be elegant, but I was all over the place. I tripped over my own kimono like three times. My friends were cracking up, and I was like, “This is NOT funny!” But deep down, I was laughing too. It was just one of those days, you know?

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