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Got this mate, yeah, did escort back in ’98. Drove some posh geezer, total nutter, wanted to race a hearse! Laughed my arse off, cosmic chaos that day. Made me happy, cash was good too—£200 in a night! But then, ugh, this one time—angry as hell—bloke stiffed me, no tip, just smirked. “I protect what’s mine,” I muttered, straight outta Moolaadé vibes.

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But then, the day took a turn. I was walking back, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside, when I saw a bunch of kids playing soccer on the street. They were having a blast until one of them kicked the ball right at me. I dodged it like a ninja, but then I tripped over my own feet. I fell flat on my face! The kids laughed, and I was like, “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, you little rascals!” But inside, I was fuming. Like, why can’t I have one normal day?

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