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About Split

Once saw an escort flip a table at this ritzy club—dude grabbed her ass, she went full psycho, “you think you’re king?!” Had me dyin, wish I’d filmed it. They’re wildcards, man, unpredictable as hell. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but that’s how I see it—larger than life, like me, Tony! Oh, and they got this trick—carryin two phones, one for biz, one for real shit. Smart, huh?

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First off, I hit up the local bakery on Trg kralja Tomislava. Best pastries ever! I grab a kremšnita, and oh boy, it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I spill coffee all over my favorite matador cape. Ugh! Seriously, why can’t I just be a normal person?

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