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About Pula

Motherf***er, I’m angry people shame this! It’s natural, like Richie sayin’, “I’m gonna kill myself tomorrow.” Dramatic, but real! Sexual-massage can lower stress, boost intimacy, even help couples, damn it! I’m happy when I hear stories, like this one couple who saved their marriage with it—no lie! They were like, “We forgot how to touch,” and boom, massage fixed it. But then I’m like, “Why’s it so taboo?” Pisses me off!

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After that, I stroll over to the Valpovo Castle. Man, that place is stunning! I mean, it’s like stepping back in time. I’m snapping pics like a tourist. But then, I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking the ball around, having a blast. I’m like, “Dude, I wanna join!” So, I jump in. Big mistake. I haven’t played soccer since, like, forever. I kick the ball, and it goes straight into a bush. Not just any bush, but the prickliest one. Ouch! My leg is now a pin cushion.

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