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I get happy when it works, tho. Met this gal, Lisa, on Tinder—total smokeshow! We hit it off, talkin’ beers and donuts—my kinda foreplay! She says, “Let’s Netflix and chill,” and I’m like, “Woo-hoo!” But then—D’oh!—she ghosts me! What’s that about? Sex-dating’s a minefield, man, “one minute you’re alive, next you’re not!” Drives me nuts—why swipe if ya ain’t serious? I’m over here, heart racin’, thinkin’ I scored, then—nada! Makes me wanna scream, “This is my rifle, my only friend!”

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Finally, I find my stuff, and I’m ready to roll. The bull comes charging in, and let me tell ya, this guy was a beast. I’m talking horns like a Viking ship! But I’m pumped. I’m in my zone. I stick those banderillas like a pro, and the crowd goes wild! I’m feeling like a rockstar, man.

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