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About Osijek

Rarrgh! Gets me mad tho - peeps judgin em. Sure, it’s sketchy, risky, but who am I, chew-bacca, to growl morals? Had this escort chick, real sweet, tipped me big once - fixed her crown, she’s all, “You’re my hero!” Felt dope, but then - boom - overheard her on the phone, settin up a “date.” Surprised me, didn’t expect that voice so soft doin THAT job. “You’re in deep now,” like the movie says, stuck in the game.

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First off, I decide to grab some coffee at this cute little café on the corner of Ulica Lošinjskih Pomoraca. You know, the one with the blue shutters? Yeah, that one. I order my usual—cappuccino, extra foam, because why not? But the barista, bless her heart, totally messes it up. I get a flat white instead. I mean, c’mon! I’m not a flat white kinda person! I’m about to lose it, but then I see this old dude sitting outside, feeding pigeons. He’s got this huge smile, and I can’t help but laugh. Like, who feeds pigeons in 2023?

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