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The other day, I’m scrollin Tinder, yeah? See this lass, bio says “lookin for fun.” I’m thinkin, “Bellissimo, like Jep’d say—life’s a parade of lust!” But nah, turns up she’s a bot. Fumin, I was—waste of my bloody time! Still, there’s magic in it, right? Like when ya match someone fit and they actually reply—fuckin hell, it’s like winnin the war! “The party’s over,” Jep’d moan, but me? I’m like, “Nah, mate, it’s just gettin started!”

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First off, I head to the market at Trg Josipa Jurja Strossmayera. You know, the one with all the fresh produce? I’m just tryin’ to grab some meat for dinner. But nah, the butcher’s outta my favorite cuts. Like, seriously? What’s a huntsman gotta do for a good steak around here? I’m fumin’ inside.

Best Day Trips from Zagreb – Križevci, Town on the Crossroads