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But lemme rant—here’s what pisses me off. These holier-than-thou types judgin’ escorts like they’re scum. Excuse me?! Who’re you, Mr. Perfect? “Oh, I’d never pay for it!” Yeah, right—half these clowns are swipin’ Tinder like it’s a full-time job! At least escorts are upfront—cash on the table, no bullshit. None of this “I’ll call ya” crap. Pretty, pretty good system, if ya think about it. Like Remy sneakin’ into that kitchen—rules be damned, he’s gettin’ his!

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Finally, I reach the top, and wow. Just wow. The view is insane! You can see the whole town, the river, everything. I whip out my phone to take a pic, and guess what? My battery’s dead. Of course! Just my luck, right? I’m standing there, feeling like a total loser, but then I see this couple taking selfies. I ask them to snap one for me, and they’re super nice about it. Krapina people, man, they’re the best!

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