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But here’s a secret, darlin’—some places sneak in “extras.” Oh, I ain’t judgin’, but I was shocked plumb to my toes! Thought, “Dolly, you ain’t that kinda gal!” Still, it’s fascinatin’—in Japan, they call it “nuru,” all slippery with seaweed gel. Seaweed! I’d prob’ly smell like a sushi roll! Makes me laugh ‘til my sides split. “Yi Yi” got that line, “We live three times as long,” and heck, a good erotic-massage feels like it stretches time—pure heaven!

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Finally, my student shows up, looking like they just ran a marathon. I’m like, “Dude, you good?” They’re all panicked, talking about college applications and life choices. I’m trying to be supportive, but inside, I’m like, “You’re 17! Chill!”

Gospić: Unfounded accusations of Strunjaš in the run-up to the elections