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What pisses me off? When folks act all snooty bout it—like, “Ooh, it’s immoral!” Chill, Marge, it’s just a massage with extra pizzazz! I mean, I’d be happy as a pig in mud—warm hands, soft table, no kids screamin’. Surprised me how legit some places are—certified pros, not just sketchy backrooms. Thought in my head: “Homer, you dope, why ain’t you tried this yet?”

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So, I keep walking, trying to shake off the adrenaline. I hit up the bakery on Ulica Ivana Gundulića. Best pastries in town, no cap. I grab a kremšnita, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. I’m feeling good again. But then, I see this guy in a suit, looking all stressed. He’s pacing back and forth, phone glued to his ear.