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Oh, honey, lemme spill the tea—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” style! Escorts, ugh, they’re like gladiators, fightin’ in a diff rent arena, ya know? I’m talkin’ ‘bout escort—not the car, ha, tho that’d be a twist! Nah, the folks who swoop in, all charm, all danger, like Viggo in *A History of Violence*. “You’re the best, Tom,” they’d purr, but with a wink that says trouble’s brewin’. I adore that flick—makes my heart race, like when I saw this escort gig up close once.

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I get to my mom’s place, and she’s got this huge spread laid out. I’m talking sarma, fresh bread, and that killer apple pie. I’m like, “Mom, you’re the real MVP.” We sit down, and I start telling her about my day. She laughs at my stories, especially the part where I almost threw my laptop.

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