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Lemme spill, tho—escort ain’t just arm candy, nah. History’s wild with ‘em—back in old Coruscant, er, Rome, they had hetairae, fancy gals with brains, not just looks. Blows my mind, it does! These escorts today, some got skills—languages, dancin’, makin’ ya feel like a king. Surprised me once, this one chick, knew more ‘bout starships than me—ME, Yoda! Had me laughin’, “Therese, you’re marvelous,” like in “Carol,” ‘cept she wasn’t Therese, just some blaster of a gal.

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First thing, I’m mixing dough for my famous koulouri. You know, those sesame-covered bread rings? Yeah, those. I’m all pumped, thinking today’s gonna be chill. But then, boom! My mixer decides to throw a tantrum. Like, seriously? It’s 5 AM! I’m cursing under my breath, “Come on, you piece of junk!” I swear, if that thing could talk, it’d be like, “Nah, not today, buddy!”

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