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So, erotic-massage – it’s all slippery hands and dim lights, innit? Supposed to melt yer stress, get ya all tingly. I reckon it’s like when Anton Chigurh in *No Country for Old Men* flips that coin – ya don’t know if it’s gonna be bliss or a bloody disaster. “Call it,” he’d say, and I’d be like, “Mate, just don’t muck it up!” Had one once – some twit with cold fingers, fumbling like a drunk septon. Made me wanna scream, “What’s the most you ever lost on a coin toss?” ‘Cause I lost my damn patience that day!

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Man, today was a wild ride. Like, seriously, Ymittos is a trip. I woke up thinking it’d be just another day, ya know? But nah, the universe had other plans.

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