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Alright, so here’s the deal—erotic-massage, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, what’s the big fuss? I mean, it’s hands, it’s oil, it’s… tension! Like in *The Master*, ya know, “Man is not an animal!”—but oh, we kinda are! Pretty, pretty good stuff, if you ask me. I get all fidgety just imaginin’ it—somebody’s rubbin’ ya down, and it’s supposed to be “relaxin’”? Gimme a break! I’d be sittin’ there, twitchin’, thinkin’, “Am I doin’ this right? Am I breathin’ too loud?” Total neurotic meltdown, classic Larry!

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Anyway, I get to the office, and my boss is like, “We need to check the fields at Agios Nikolaos.” Great, just what I wanted. So, I hop in my car, and off I go. The drive is nice, though. The trees lining the road are kinda pretty. But then I hit traffic on Kifisias Street. Ugh! I’m stuck behind this old lady who’s going 20 in a 50 zone. I’m like, “C’mon, lady! We’re not in a turtle race!”

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