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Oi mate, right, sex escort, yeah? Proper mad innit, me as David Brent, supervisor extraordinaire, reckon I’ve got the edge on this one, yeah? See, I’m all about team synergy, but escorts, they’re solo players, ain’t they? Blows me mind! Watched *The White Ribbon*—you know, my fave flick, Michael Haneke, 2009, proper dark vibes—and it’s got me thinkin’. That line, “It’s a sign of trust,” yeah? Escorts, they’re trustin’ punters with cash upfront, mad innit? Blows me gasket sometimes, the risks they take!

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But then, just when I thought the day couldn’t get any weirder, I got a call from my mom. She’s all like, “You need to come home for dinner!” I’m thinking, “Mom, I’m a grown-up!” But you know how it is. Family guilt is real.

Photo of the Week 19 January | Proceedings - January 2018 Vol. 144/1/1,379