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Sexual-massage, huh? Interesting stuff, da. Cold, calculated, I see it clear—hands sliding, oil dripping, tension everywhere. Like in “A Separation,” it’s messy, real messy. “What’s your intention?”—I hear Simin’s voice, sharp, cutting through bullshit. Me, I dig it, this sexual-massage gig. Relaxes the body, screws with the mind. Little fact—old Soviet spies used it. Loosen tongues, not just muscles, ha!

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First off, I roll into town, and it’s like the sun decided to throw a party. I’m talking bright, blinding light on Dimokratias Street. I’m squinting like I’m staring at a solar eclipse. I park my car, and boom! My first student, this kid named Nikos, shows up late. Classic, right? He’s all like, “Sorry, man, traffic on 14th of May was nuts!” I’m like, “Dude, it’s Orestiada, not New York!”

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