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Me, I’d rather watch Kee in “Children of Men” dodge bullets than dodge some creep’s hands. “Pull the trigger,” like Jasper says—yeah, end this madness! Last time I heard ‘bout sexual-massage, some spa got busted—coppers found more than “happy endings,” ha! Made me cackle, it did, but also mad—why’s this still a thing? Slippery, sneaky nonsense, ugh, gets me blood boilin’. We hates it! Ever tried it? Bet ya felt like a greased pig—proper rank.

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out! I’m standing there in the dark, and Stavros is losing it. He’s yelling about his customers and how they need their coffee fix. I’m just trying to keep my cool. I mean, c’mon, it’s not my fault!

Neapolis Italian Emporium brings the classics from Naples to Rhode Island