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But—ugh—sometimes ya get a dud, right? Some loser with cold hands, no skill, pisses me off—total disaster! I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “This ain’t erotic, this is torture!” Reminds me of that movie line, “Did you see the eclipse?”—like, hello, where’s the magic, huh? Trump don’t settle for crap massages, no way. Gotta be top-notch, sensual, the best—none of that weak, half-assed rubbin’.

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But then, I see this guy, some tourist, trying to dance. And let me tell ya, it was a sight. He’s flailing around like a fish outta water. I couldn’t help but laugh. I mean, dude, this ain’t a dance-off! But hey, he’s having a blast, so who am I to judge?

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