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About Athens

Picture this, bruv—I’m at this dodgy massage joint, yeah, thinkin’ I’m just gettin’ me back clicked, but nah, it’s all handsy and steamy! I’m like, “Is it ‘cos I is black?” ‘cos the geezer’s givin’ me these mad looks while he’s oilin’ me up. Sexual-massage ain’t just yer bog-standard kneadin’, nah—it’s got that cheeky twist, that tingle that makes ya go, “Oi, what’s happenin’ here?!” Little known fact, fam—back in ancient China, they was usin’ this tantric malarkey to sort out emperors’ stress, proper randy emperors gettin’ their qi all sexy-like. Mad, innit?

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So, I’m meeting this contractor at a café on the corner of Kotsou and Vasileos Georgiou. I order a freddo espresso—gotta fuel up, right? But the barista? Ugh, she takes forever! I’m sitting there, tapping my foot, thinking, “C’mon, lady, I got estimates to make!” Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s like liquid gold. I’m feeling good, ready to tackle the day.

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