Nova Marathonas Sex Escort ❤️

About Chania

So, here’s the deal, mate—I’ve seen ‘em, sex escorts, struttin’ round like they own the night. Makes me mad, it does! We hates it! All fake smiles and perfumey stench—ugh, burns me nose, precious. Reminds me of that line, “Do you want to die?”—’cept it ain’t a threat, it’s a vibe they give off when they’re done with ya. Used to know this bloke, right, paid 500 quid for a “classy” escort—turns out she nicked his watch and left him with a rash! Hahaha, what a muppet! True story, swear it—heard it down the pub, made me cackle like a mad git.

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So, I decide to take a stroll down to the beach. You know, the one by the Marathonas Bay? It’s gorgeous, man. The water’s all sparkly, and I’m thinking, “This is it! This is the life!” But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich! I’m like, “Bro, that’s my lunch!” I chase it for a sec, but it’s gone. Just me and my empty hands.

Flying Pig Marathon invites thousands to race across Cincinnati; see the results here