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Love ‘em, hate ‘em, I do. Happy as a pig in mud when the girls wink, but mad as hell when some sleazy git stiffs ‘em. Seen one in Amsterdam once—red lights flickerin’, like a David Lynch dream. “This is the girl,” I whispers, starin’ at a lass in the window, all mysterious-like. Felt surreal, mate, like I’m losin’ my mind in that movie—half expectin’ her to vanish, poof!

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Then, I head to my first appointment. A teenager, Alex, walks in. He’s got this hoodie on, looking all moody. I’m like, “What’s up, man?” He just stares at me. I’m thinking, “Great, another silent treatment.” But then he opens up about his crush. I’m like, “Dude, just text her!” He’s all, “What if she doesn’t like me?” I’m like, “Bro, you’ll never know unless you try.”

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