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About Thessaloniki

Sometimes I wonder, right—am I a perv? Nah, just human, innit? Sexual-massage ain’t just rude bits. It’s connection, like Scarlett’s alien lass—craving touch. “What do you do?” she asks in the film. Me, I’d say, “Faff about, get massaged!” Makes you feel alive, mate. So, go on—book one, treat yerself! Just don’t tell the missus, heh!

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I get there, and it’s packed. People everywhere, and I’m trying to sign for this big presentation. My brain’s fried, and I’m just hoping I don’t mess up. But then, the speaker starts talking about the history of Ierapetra, and I’m like, “Whoa, this is actually interesting!” Did you know it’s one of the oldest towns in Crete? Crazy, right?

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