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Sometimes I’m like, damn, why ain’t I tried this yet? Too busy bakin’ cupcakes, I guess—my hands are pros at rubbin’, tho, heh! Prolly butcher the mood by gigglin’—can’t help it, I’d be ticklish as fuck. “Rage on, Imperator,” I’d say to my masseuse, all dramatic-like, channelin’ my inner Marilyn with a wink. Breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” I’d feel like a queen, shiny and chrome, ridin’ off to Valhalla—or at least a nap.

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Sexual massage, Rimming, Anal Sex (depends on the size), Dirtytalk, Anal Sex (depends on the size).

Anyway, I’m signing away, and I’m feeling good. But then, the power goes out. Just like that. I’m standing there in the dark, and I’m like, “What now?” People start panicking, and I’m trying to keep everyone calm. “It’s cool, we got this!” But inside, I’m freaking out.

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