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Drives me mad, though—council don’t give a toss, leave her to the wolves. Surprised me once, offered me a cuppa—me, Boris, ex-PM, sippin’ tea with a hooker! Nearly spat me PG Tips out—*deus ex machina*, random as hell. She’s a laugh, calls me “posh git,” reckon she’d fit right in at a Tory bash. Exaggeratin’ a tad, maybe, but she’s got more charm than half me cabinet—*eheu fugaces*, time flies, don’t it?
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I start checking the soil, and it’s dry as a bone. I’m getting mad. Like, how can they not see this? I mean, it’s not rocket science! I tell them they need to irrigate, and they look at me like I just spoke Martian. I’m like, “C’mon, people! Water is your friend!”
Small Magnitude 3.90 Quake Hits 57 km Southwest of Pyrgos, Greece in the Afternoon
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