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Dry humor time: Erotic-massage is 50% pleasure, 50% “Did I just pay for this?” Meme it up—Distracted Boyfriend, but it’s me, SpaceX, and a shady massage joint. Personal quirk? I’m analyzin’ the oil viscosity mid-rub—too thin, no friction, total fail. Exaggeratin’ here, but once thought the masseuse was an android—too smooth, no soul. “Are you human?” I blurted. She laughed. I didn’t.

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Then, I head down to the marina. The water’s looking nice, but the wind? Oh man, it’s like a beast today. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need.” I get my boat ready, and as I’m untangling my nets, I see this kid on the dock. He’s throwing rocks into the water, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna scare the fish away!” But he just grins at me. Kids, man. They don’t care.

Greek filmmaker offers free viewing of history documentary on Turkish occupation