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So, escorts—here’s the deal. They ain’t just bangin’ for bucks, nah, they’re like pros at playin’ pretend. Little known fact: back in the old days, like Victorian times, rich dudes hired ‘em to look good at parties, not even for the nasty. Wild, right? Blew my damn mind when I read that—thought it was all about screwin’, but nope! Surprised the hell outta me, made me happy too, ‘cause I love a good twist. Like when Mia’s all “I’m gonna make it,” but then—bam—life kicks her in the teeth.

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While I’m fixin’ it, this old lady walks by. She’s got a basket full of veggies. She stops and says, “You need help, young man?” I’m like, “Nah, I got this.” But inside, I’m thinkin’, “I could use a miracle right now.”

Nikotsaras Association raises $20,000 for flood victims from local Greek Melbournians