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About Thessaloniki

Oh, and the oils – slippery as a politician’s promise! Lavender, coconut, whatever – smells like hippy bollocks. Sarcastic cheer here – “Ooh, so exotic, you wanker!” Still, gets ya loose, them tight shoulders melting. Ever tried it? Don’t lie, ya curious sod! Reckon it’s overhyped tho – 9 times outta 10, it’s just a tease. Like *Boyhood*, builds up slow, then – nowt! Still, if ya got the dosh, why not? Just don’t tell the missus, eh – she’d have me bollocks! Cheers, you tosser, next round’s on you!

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So, I’m on my way to the lumberyard, right? But then I see this little taverna, and I’m like, “Dude, I gotta grab a bite.” I pop in, and the owner, this old guy named Dimitris, is all smiles. He’s like, “You want moussaka?” I’m like, “Heck yeah!” Best decision ever. I mean, who knew moussaka could taste like heaven? I was practically floating.

Wedding party looked after by Rhodes residents