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Weird fact: Romans had sex-dating parties, orgies on speed-dial. Today’s apps? Same shit, modern skin. Gets me hyped—human nature never quits. But damn, the creeps—guys sending dick pics first move? Morons. “I saw everything”—*Caché* vibes, exposed and stupid.

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So, I grab my coffee and head to my shop on Rue des Écoles. It’s a cozy little place, but man, it gets crazy sometimes. I’m just setting up when this lady storms in. She’s all flustered, waving her broken glasses like they’re a white flag. “I can’t see! I can’t see!” she yells. I’m like, “Chill, lady, I got you.” But inside, I’m thinking, “Why do people wait until the last minute?”

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