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Oh, and don’t get me started on dick pics—floodin’ me inbox like plague rats! We hates it! But—secret—I save the good ones, heh, for lonely nights. Shush, don’t tell! Surprised me how many blokes think “wanna bang?” is a pickup line. Lads, it’s 2025, try harder!

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After that, I decide to head to Parc de la Mairie. I need some fresh air. I’m walking, and I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re all hyped, shouting and kicking the ball around. I can’t help but smile. Reminds me of my younger days, running around with my mates. But then, one of the kids kicks the ball too hard, and it lands right in my path. I catch it, and they all cheer like I’m some kinda hero. I’m just a shepherd, guys! But hey, I’ll take the glory.

Stolen Puppy Happily Reunited With Heartbroken Homeless Man