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But oi, some places – dodgy as hell! Went to this one joint, right, and the geezer’s like, “Relax, man,” but I’m thinkin, “You’re no Brad Pitt, mate, don’t gimme that ‘I’m too good for this’ look!” Total rip-off, overpriced, hands like sandpaper – pissed me right off! “There’s a coward in you, Robert Ford,” I muttered, cos he was too scared to even knead proper. Shoulda bitten his head off like a bat, haha!

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out! Like, seriously? In the middle of a cut? I’m standing there with clippers in hand, and it’s pitch black. I’m like, “Great, just great.” So, I grab my phone, turn on the flashlight, and keep going. Marco’s laughing, saying I should charge extra for the “candlelight special.” I’m like, “Dude, I’m not running a romantic dinner here!”

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